Totally Killer
SimilarA Nightmare on Elm Street (1984), Back to the Future Part II (1989), Back to the Future Part III (1990),
Bend It Like Beckham (2002) Billy Elliot (2000), Cléo from 5 to 7 (1962), I Am Not a Serial Killer (2016), Italian for Beginners (2000), Little Miss Sunshine (2006), Mars Attacks! (1996), Saw II (2005), Silent Hill (2006), Star Trek: First Contact (1996), Strange Days (1995), The Devil's Rejects (2005), The Matrix Reloaded (2003), The Matrix Revolutions (2003), The Party (1980), The Party 2 (1982), Twelve Monkeys (1995),
Watch afterSaw X (2023), Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse (2023), Talk to Me (2023), The Equalizer 3 (2023),
The low-budget confines of Blumhouse movies mean that any idea can become a movie, including bold original visions like Whiplash or Get Out. Unfortunately, it also means a lot of subpar stuff can easily get the green light. The latest example is the new Amazon/Blumhouse collaboration, Totally Killer. Hailing from director Nahnatchka Khan, Totally Killer dares to ask a question no reasonable soul was pondering. “What if Happy Death Day and Hot Tub Time Machine had a tedious baby?” Buckle up, horror devotees. Here comes yet another dose of 1980s nostalgia and some frighteningly lousy editing. Continue Reading →
Meg 2: The Trench
Ever since James Cameron boldly wrote “S” after ALIEN on a chalkboard and then changed it to a dollar sign, the quickest way to sequel-ize your killer extraterrestrial/reptile/mammal/whatever has been to add more of it. You scored a hit with people fighting one giant mosquito? Great, here’s a sequel with six of them. Continue Reading →
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Mutant Mayhem
Despite their hue, not all TMNT films deserved to be greenlit.
Kevin Eastman and Peter Laird created The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles back in 1984. Now almost 40 years later, what started as a comic book has inspired seven movies, five television series, and countless amounts of merchandise. This week the four ninja tortoises return in a new animated incarnation, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Mutant Mayhem. Considering I’ve been a fan of the Turtles since six years old, this seems like the perfect time to put an official rating on four decades of movies. Some are gnarly, some tubular, and there’s always a whole lot of cowabunga.
Writers Note: This list doesn’t include the recent Netflix installment Rise of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: The Movie, a TV-movie crossover Batman vs. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, or the live recording of the 1990 Coming Out of Their Shells stage show. That one you can catch on YouTube, although I don’t know why you would. Continue Reading →
Talk to Me
SimilarA Nightmare on Elm Street (1984), Alien (1979), Aliens (1986), Carrie (1976), On Her Majesty's Secret Service (1969), The Rage: Carrie 2 (1999), The Shining (1980),
Watch afterBarbie (2023) Blue Beetle (2023), Five Nights at Freddy's (2023), Meg 2: The Trench (2023), Mission: Impossible - Dead Reckoning Part One (2023),
Oppenheimer (2023) Saw X (2023), The Equalizer 3 (2023), The Nun II (2023),
Things have been very bad for much of the world for a very long time, and they won’t improve any time soon. I don’t mean to start things off on a bummer note, but to point out that from such dire circumstances comes one benefit: the horror movie renaissance that started in the late 2010s only seems to be getting better. Just this year we’ve gotten the low-fi nightmares Skinamarink and The Outwaters, horror comedy with M3GAN and Cocaine Bear, another mostly solid entry in the Scream franchise, too many indie horror films to list here (Bad Girl Boogey and Brooklyn 45 are but a couple), and the roaring return of the Evil Dead series. Even if there weren’t another release for the rest of the year, it’d still be a great year for horror. Continue Reading →
Joy Ride
SimilarLittle Miss Sunshine (2006), The Holiday (2006),
StudioLionsgate,
Joy Ride is a film filled with rude and crude jokes throughout and often fairly ramshackle in its construction. Those with more delicate constitutions may be chagrined to discover it tends to reduce its few Caucasian characters of note to little more than punchlines. It also contains—let me consult the next page of my notes—more big laughs than any other film I’ve seen so far this year. Plus, carefully layered among its more outrageous elements, you’ll find a surprising amount of heart. The result is both a genuine delight and a wonderful alternative to the soul-deadening blockbusters that have glutted multiplexes this summer. Continue Reading →
The Blackening
SimilarSaw (2004), Saw II (2005), Saw III (2006), Saw IV (2007), Shrek (2001), Shrek the Third (2007),
Watch afterThe Flash (2023),
StudioMRC,
The Blackening is a horror-satire based on a popular 2018 short film of the same name. It mercilessly skewered the genre conceit that the Black character is always the first to die—a notion so familiar that this year saw the publication of an examination of Black-related horror films entitled The Black Guy Dies First. To do so, it presented a scenario in which all the potential victims are Black. They argue about who among them is truly the Blackest while downplaying their own ethnicity to survive. (“I qualified for the Winter Olympics.”) Continue Reading →
El hombre del saco
Similar2001: A Space Odyssey (1968), A Nightmare on Elm Street (1984), Anatomy of a Murder (1959),
Blade Runner (1982) War of the Worlds (2005),
Watch afterMeg 2: The Trench (2023), Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse (2023), Talk to Me (2023), The Nun II (2023),
Studio20th Century Studios,
What did your boogeyman look like? Continue Reading →